terça-feira, 13 de abril de 2010

Gotta Love

"Dear Hyung-nim,

"I waited as long as I could, I really, really did. I kept on hoping that if I only sent out one more letter then you could come and help me out of this mess I made. But I can't wait anymore, because my people need me to make a decision.

I know that it means me picking a side and losing a part of me as well, but I gotta do it for my people, they believe in me, even when I've been a pretty lousy nation. My bosses think that if I had been raised here than this wouldn't have happened. But they're wrong.

And either way I don't blame you, I never did.

You told me time and time again that you weren't ready for this, that you couldn't love me in the way I loved you, but I didn't listen. I never listened. I just pushed you and pushed you knowing full well that one day your resistance would crumble and you would give in.

I knew and I didn't care, I just wanted you to love me like I love you.

I'm the one that made this happen because I had to go my own way and forget the way things should be. But I don't regret it, not at all. Being with you was like being whole for the first time. It felt like something old and ancient just clicked into place, it was right. And for that reason I don't regret what I did, I'm just sorry that everything went downhill because of it.

I know that siding with Alfred and the others will make us enemies, and it hurts to think of us as anything other than brothers or lovers now I guess, but one day it will pass. If I've learned one thing from leaving home it's that history is full of people doing horrible things to each other. But the amazing thing is that in a few hundred years, sometimes even decades, it is forgotten and things are able to be reborn. Even with nations.

Arthur and Francis tell me stories of the horrible stuff they've done to hurt the other since they were children, but somehow they are able to accept it and move on, I think they love each other as well, but they'd sooner marry that Russia guy than admit it out loud. They've literally beaten each other senseless and still care about each other, so I'm sure we can handle this.

And that, above all else, is my hope.

That one day, you'll be able to forgive me, and we'll be able to be normal. We don't even have to do it again. (But if you wanna, I am totally all for it, because I love you and I really, really want to try that whole sex thing again because it was wow, and I can't imagine doing those kinds of things with anyone but you, no matter what Francis says.) But more than that, I just want to be able to actually see you and not hope that a letter will get through to you. I'm much better at talking anyways, at least that's what Xiang says.

For the first time, I'm ready to be me and to really go my own way. I may not be completely whole, but I can be, and with any luck, we can be whole together.
So don't worry about me so much, okay aniki? After all bravery and greatness were made in me right?

Love, Im Yong Soo

South Korea.

(Ps. Don't be too angry at Kiku. He maybe an asshole, but he's the asshole that delivered this letter right?)

(Essa fanfic me fez chorar mais do que vocês seriam capazes de imaginar. Eu não vou traduzir, mas vocês realmente deveriam ler. Foi o que me fez começar a gostar de China/Coréia. ♥)

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